Discomfort is a part of growth...

Do people ever talk about that? Yes, there are peaks, but there’s also valleys and I’m always going to be transparent here, and we can all agree that social media is a weird, pretty place and not everything is perfect. Yes, it’s only been 3 weeks post 9-5 lol. 

Sidebar: I’ve written this newsletter three times already. It just never felt right to me. So hopefully this feels right. 

As you all may know, I quit my job to bet on myself & begin this journey of fully diving into the food industry… all of it (I’m still figuring it out, honestly)

The first week out of my job was weird. The first day, I had margaritas with my mom, and while it was freeing af, I also thought, “what in the entire actual fuck!?”

I questioned everything. I was like what in the hell did I do? I hate change. I like my comfort zone. I like a stable paycheck!

I was also going on this Mexico eat, pray, love trip solo fucking dolo when I realized it on the plane I was sitting next to all these couples or girl trip groups. Again, what the entire fuck? Yes, I’m staying with my two guy cousins who live here but they are on their own personal journey.

Recently, I saw this quote on IG - “Avoiding discomfort is like rejecting growth. You need both if you want to create real change in your life,” and let me tell you, I’m uncomfortable. I recently listened to this Oprah Super Soul Sundays podcast episode (which I’m late af too) about changing those negative sayings because you will invite that energy into your life. So instead of saying “I’m uncomfortable,”  I’m saying, “I’m growing.” 

Do not get me wrong at all. My friend tribe is strong af (I could actually cry about it). The day after I released the newsletter (which I was editing up until 30 seconds before I pressed send), the support & love I received was overwhelming. I’m beyond grateful and just fucking thankful. Also, the opportunities & partnerships that have come my way have been really amazing.

However, your inner thoughts are strong af! It’s all how you move through them (thank you therapy lol).

Before I left for Mexico, I thought of everything because the devil that is social media makes you think you should be working 24 hours a day lol:

• Should I be writing a cookbook proposal?

• What the actual fuck am I doing?

• Should I feel bad about taking a nap?

• Should I be planning food content?

• What if I get sick in Mexico?!

• What if I run out of the money I saved?!

BUT, here’s what I am doing, learning, and finally realized at 11:58pm at the club in Playa Del Carmen watching my two guy cousins dance the night away lol.

• Being actually fully, present 

• Celebrating my wins (both big & small)

• I’m creating a life I want to live & figuring it out too

• I’m decompressing

• I’m cooking with a group of hard ass working women who want to feed their community, their food, their way and in their small but mighty kitchen 

• Allowing myself to cry & feel all the emotions (my bank account actually got hacked into today as I’m typing this so I was on a whole spiral)

• I’m having tacos every damn day 

• I’m maybe showering every other day...I actually did not shower today but went straight to the pool. Stinky and everything lol (don’t judge)

• I’m wearing the same shit everyday (biker shorts & sports bra, black flowy shirt and bathing suit or these green vintage pants that I’m obsessed with)

• I’m taking 4-5 mile morning walks and purposely getting lost while listening to all the podcasts 

• Journaling & being very inspired by the food around me 

• Having deep ass conversations with my cousins that we feel like this trip is cleansing for all of us 

• Being by myself & present with myself 

• Actually taking a deep breath (you know those deep breaths where you are just really grateful..those deep breathes)

Above all... I’m being present. It took me a little over a week to get here because my mind was racing. But after reading the alchemist (shoutout to my sister friend Janelle who gave this to me right after I quit), I realized I’m already on my journey and I’m pursuing my personal legend, and the ebbs & flows or peaks and valleys are all natural.

Hell, it’s only week- fucking - three but listen, your thoughts are a lot! I had another crying WTF moment and my partner had to bring me back down and said “Alex, feel all the emotions but enjoy yourself.”

Also, my twin flame John said to me before he left to go back to LA on his own personal journey “some days you’re gonna cry, some days you’re gonna be drunk all day, and some days you’re gonna have a great fucking time and question everything, but enjoy every minute of it.”

I promise, this is not becoming a journal newsletter and the exclusive recipes are coming back, I’m just enjoying all the tacos, walking miles everyday, eating & being inspired. 

Update as of 5/29 - I received an energy reading yesterday and she basically pulled all these cards that reaffirmed all of this - isn’t the universe wild? I love it.

Be present & enjoy the journey. 

Until next newsletter!

Xo - Alex